Fed up - feet getting worse

[Barbi C]

Right we are housebuilding - with very little money & it gets stressful, now I also have my husbands ex living with us - now I guess I have a right to be stressed?? not really, the house is brill, can't believe we've done this! Melly's ex is ok, we are finding our feet & she contributes to costs so I don;t have problem, she needs somewhere to be safe & Shasa their youngest has commented how much better she is, I'm the caring type so having someone who needs me is ok. Also she has taken over the hovering & loads the dishwasher etc... I cook she clears up - seems to work... so why are my friends telling me its wrong?? surely its not wrong to give someone somewhere to live when they have problems? I don;t feel able to talk to my friends as they all seem horrified? Its not as if its just us & her in the house, we also have 2 other lodgers, one of whom eats with us most nights, it makes life more interesting & I'll admit we are totally different & she gives me a totally different view of life at times! I need my friends support but find they can't see how this works - she is not the predatory type, if I said I was unhappy with the situation Melly would understand, but its not in my nature - so why the message? is it the stress of the situation or the feeling that my friends feel I'm being put upon that is making my foot worse - today its all around the edge & around my toes & feels like someone is pushing in nails when I walk - so I scratch.... ahhhh!! think its time for the saw.... sorry just miserable - and I have a low pain threshold which does not help! been on anti-depressents for long time, have been told not to come off again as I have a chemical imbalance, re-triggered by shingles so the glums are a fact of life, but I worry now that this very fact is making my psoriasis worse?? ahhh!! Fact of life the ex has to stay, I have no problem with her, I've no idea if she has a problem with me, but seems unlikely following the big hug I got the other day! so will someone just tell me I'm doing the right thing..... please

ok whinge over! feel better its off my chest (all 48D of it)

[Fred]

Well first off stress plays a huge role in flare ups, and I would say it's probably the worst thing for it. You say your situation is ok, but there is so much going on in your house with the ex, 2 lodges, and house building. Sounds like a disaster to me

We used to have a family member live with us for a while and although we got on, I found flare ups were more common. I wouldn't think having you husbands ex living with you to be ideal, and no it's not wrong to give someone somewhere to live when they have problems. But it should be temporary, and your relationship will only get worse in my opinion. Oooh I'm feeling like an agony aunt now

You also mention you're using anti depressants, you should try to find the root of you depression and not rely on the pills. The pills will only hide the problem and not cure it, and I suspect a lot of your problems could be with the situation you are living in.

Depression and stress cause a psoriasis flare up, psoriasis gets worse and can cause depression. (vicious circle) As you are a caring type you should look into using that to your advantage, I find helping people makes me feel good, but having them as a lodger makes me feel bad.

Remember you could be stressed out without knowing it, what you think is ok may be causing problems deep inside.

[Barbi C]

thank you Fred, think its time to have a chat with dr again. yesterday was a bad day, very frustrating, I was stressing because Melly was having a clear out & I have issues when he does that, as it normally means things get truly lost.... on this occasion the pulleys for the drying rack that I have been trying to get put back up for the past 2 years.... I did know where they were - now I don;t have a clue!! I think it was the dust in the basement that has made my feet itch so much, seem better when I keep them cool!??? I love having bare feet & now I can;t and it is one of the things that really has been getting me down, especially as I used to live in fitflops & now I'm unable to wear them as its between my toes as well as on the sole. OK and chill thank you for letting me vent - I've read some of the other entries and I feel that my little problem is really nothing compared to others, so need to get mine into perspective, just wish it didn't hurt so much. Right now I will cheer up I am going to town & buy myself my promised Kath Kidston diary.... good help the shop if they don;t have any..... tell me does chocolate improve psoriasis????

[Hanna]

Remember you could be stressed out without knowing it, what you think is ok may be causing problems deep inside.

Very true, most people think I'm very chilled and laid back....yet I'm covered in psoriasis and I am a serious stress head.

Also don't listen to others, if you feel your doing the right thing then go with your own feelings

X

[Fred]

tell me does chocolate improve psoriasis????

Dark chocolate is ok, but white or milk chocolate some reports say can aggravate psoriasis. However if chocolate makes you feel good then yes it will help.

[Barbi C]

Thank you Folks, been shopping got some of the stuff I wanted, still looking for jam jar lids locally, but have ordered from lakeland, so I can finish making the rosehip syrup for the winter cold season, as half the household is addicted - feet hurt, but hey in the scheme of things its not major, decided need re-visit the doctor - I so appreciate being able to get it off my chest

[Caroline]

thank you Fred, think its time to have a chat with dr again. yesterday was a bad day, very frustrating, I was stressing because Melly was having a clear out & I have issues when he does that, as it normally means things get truly lost.... on this occasion the pulleys for the drying rack that I have been trying to get put back up for the past 2 years.... I did know where they were - now I don;t have a clue!! I think it was the dust in the basement that has made my feet itch so much, seem better when I keep them cool!??? I love having bare feet & now I can;t and it is one of the things that really has been getting me down, especially as I used to live in fitflops & now I'm unable to wear them as its between my toes as well as on the sole. OK and chill thank you for letting me vent - I've read some of the other entries and I feel that my little problem is really nothing compared to others, so need to get mine into perspective, just wish it didn't hurt so much. Right now I will cheer up I am going to town & buy myself my promised Kath Kidston diary.... good help the shop if they don;t have any..... tell me does chocolate improve psoriasis????

Ok, let me try to make some cheese of this..
1) feet hurt, so stressful situation, despite the fact that you accepted the "ex", which to my opinion principally should not be a problem. An ex is an ex...
2) Melly is clear out ?? is he not at home? And do you need 2 years to put up a drying rack? I can do that in an hour....
3) the cold is nice for your feet. Do you have PsA on your feet? Then indeed coolness is lovely.
4) you cannot wear these awful slippers...
5) you bought some kind of agenda? Probably popular over there with you.
6) no, chocolate is great, but not for psoriasis... but who cares

[Barbi C]

thank you caroline
I will remember that not all here have english as a first language in future.

1) - like your attitude!

2) Melly is still here (in body, not sure about spirit at times ) Clear out = sort out, tidy up. We have been building house for the past 7 years, the drying rack got taken down when the ceiling board went up with new lights - lights need moving, in way of where drying rack went - mel would not put up as he said it was in the way, it has taken 2 years of on and off argument for him to accept my point of view - I could have put up myself, but it was one of those jobs that just didn;t get done! I AM going to do tommorrow - now I have purchased some more pulleys to hang it from. - I will post some pictures when I figure how.

3. Yes cool is good - hot water makes them throb - and yes psa on feet, of late been getting worse, probably reaction to a very very stressful summer.

4. slippers - I prefer sheepwool ones! But I love flipflops, but now I must give up Such is life.

5. my cath kidston diary is lovely - its my appointment book - essential handbag item. As I have no fulltime job, I work for the local council at election time & have students to stay in the house, this pays for me to look after my elderly parents.

6. oh just knew choc would be on the list..... But so what.... I don;t really like wine & it upsets my digestive problems! so I will have my chocolate!!

7. Bad foot = I can sit down & do my sewing

Been a bit more positive today -